weasel part one
This column used to apear in a Sydney mag on a weekly basis. It now goes to print in Brisbane, monthly. It's purely about pop music as opposed to movies or tv, but the music side is a thinly veiled excuse to gossip about and laugh at tragic celebs.
Forgive the capital letters. They are the desired formatting of the magazine, and I can't be arsed to change them all.
WEASEL: POP WITH BITE
With Greece having won Eurovision, SHAKIN’ STEVENS having won the British series ‘Hit Me Baby One More Time’, and with AUSTRALIAN IDOL only in the audition stages, my attention has naturally been diverted to the U.S. of A where ‘Hit Me Baby’ has just, predictably, been copied by the NBC network. So far, the series has seen wins by ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT and VANILLA ICE, who performed a modified version of DESTINY’S CHILD’s ‘Survivor’. They saw off the likes of CECE PENISTON (remember ‘Finally’ from the ‘Priscilla’ soundtrack?), TIFFANY (who made the final of the UK version), The KNACK and… errr… HADDAWAY.
Of course, none of these acts really hold a candle to BANANARAMA, who, as I informed you last time, are back! I’ve now managed to hear their new single ‘Move In My Direction’ and can tell you its just the sort of hollow poptasticness the world is desperately in need of. I could only be more excited if COLLETTE (who recently made an appearance at a night club in Sydney) was to follow the lead of MELISSA TKAUTZ and score a new record deal. A new song, ‘Lies’, backed by ‘Sexy (Is the Word) 05’, is coming out in July, with Melissa apparently having been signed on the basis of a similar performance.
If nothing else, Melissa can hope to outperform GERI HALLIWELL, whose latest single ‘Desire’ debuted at a disastrous number 22 in the UK (where, keep in mind, the fast movement of the charts means that anything debuting outside the top ten is considered a serious flop). This can only help bring about a SPICE GIRLS reunion, which MEL B (who, rumour has it, is about to wow the world with a great new song after her success starring in ‘Rent’) says is more likely to occur in July 2006 (ten years from the release of ‘Wannabe’) than for the upcoming Live 8 concerts.
Still, pop music can’t all be about washed up stars, since there are also those on their way to being washed up. BRITNEY SPEARS is having another crack with her new single ‘Someday (I Will Understand)’, which was premiered on the last episode (well it’s the ‘series finale’ at any rate) of her flop reality show ‘Britney and Kevin: Chaotic’. We can only hope that what she will ‘someday understand’ is that she shouldn’t have married a no-hoper white-trash leech and that she definitely shouldn’t have subjected the world to home videos of the two of them. Meanwhile, at kevinfederline.com you’ll find his unofficial fan site, with a biography that is strangely blank…
Following Britters’ example of working with her man is HILARY DUFF, whose boyfriend, BENJI MADDEN of GOOD CHARLOTTE has helped out on ‘Wake Up’, the first single to be released from her upcoming album ‘Most Wanted’, as well as a few more tracks for it. It seems that he and brother Joe would probably be co-writing the whole album, but for one twist. It’s a best of album! Yes, after two albums (plus one Christmas album in the US at least, although either way its more than Melissa Tkautz ever released), Hilary has decided that she needs a retrospective. Maybe she is merely acknowledging the number of her fans who have Attention Deficit Disorder and need to be regularly reminded exactly who she is (after all, her second album sold less than half as many copies as her debut). Or maybe she’s just been watching ‘Hit Me Baby’ and she’s getting a bit nervous…
Forgive the capital letters. They are the desired formatting of the magazine, and I can't be arsed to change them all.
WEASEL: POP WITH BITE
With Greece having won Eurovision, SHAKIN’ STEVENS having won the British series ‘Hit Me Baby One More Time’, and with AUSTRALIAN IDOL only in the audition stages, my attention has naturally been diverted to the U.S. of A where ‘Hit Me Baby’ has just, predictably, been copied by the NBC network. So far, the series has seen wins by ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT and VANILLA ICE, who performed a modified version of DESTINY’S CHILD’s ‘Survivor’. They saw off the likes of CECE PENISTON (remember ‘Finally’ from the ‘Priscilla’ soundtrack?), TIFFANY (who made the final of the UK version), The KNACK and… errr… HADDAWAY.
Of course, none of these acts really hold a candle to BANANARAMA, who, as I informed you last time, are back! I’ve now managed to hear their new single ‘Move In My Direction’ and can tell you its just the sort of hollow poptasticness the world is desperately in need of. I could only be more excited if COLLETTE (who recently made an appearance at a night club in Sydney) was to follow the lead of MELISSA TKAUTZ and score a new record deal. A new song, ‘Lies’, backed by ‘Sexy (Is the Word) 05’, is coming out in July, with Melissa apparently having been signed on the basis of a similar performance.
If nothing else, Melissa can hope to outperform GERI HALLIWELL, whose latest single ‘Desire’ debuted at a disastrous number 22 in the UK (where, keep in mind, the fast movement of the charts means that anything debuting outside the top ten is considered a serious flop). This can only help bring about a SPICE GIRLS reunion, which MEL B (who, rumour has it, is about to wow the world with a great new song after her success starring in ‘Rent’) says is more likely to occur in July 2006 (ten years from the release of ‘Wannabe’) than for the upcoming Live 8 concerts.
Still, pop music can’t all be about washed up stars, since there are also those on their way to being washed up. BRITNEY SPEARS is having another crack with her new single ‘Someday (I Will Understand)’, which was premiered on the last episode (well it’s the ‘series finale’ at any rate) of her flop reality show ‘Britney and Kevin: Chaotic’. We can only hope that what she will ‘someday understand’ is that she shouldn’t have married a no-hoper white-trash leech and that she definitely shouldn’t have subjected the world to home videos of the two of them. Meanwhile, at kevinfederline.com you’ll find his unofficial fan site, with a biography that is strangely blank…
Following Britters’ example of working with her man is HILARY DUFF, whose boyfriend, BENJI MADDEN of GOOD CHARLOTTE has helped out on ‘Wake Up’, the first single to be released from her upcoming album ‘Most Wanted’, as well as a few more tracks for it. It seems that he and brother Joe would probably be co-writing the whole album, but for one twist. It’s a best of album! Yes, after two albums (plus one Christmas album in the US at least, although either way its more than Melissa Tkautz ever released), Hilary has decided that she needs a retrospective. Maybe she is merely acknowledging the number of her fans who have Attention Deficit Disorder and need to be regularly reminded exactly who she is (after all, her second album sold less than half as many copies as her debut). Or maybe she’s just been watching ‘Hit Me Baby’ and she’s getting a bit nervous…
posted by weasel at 5:21 PM
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