Another travesty

Besides a few tribute albums and the inevitable dance versions, most of Madonna's back catalogue remains relatively 'uncovered'. Teenage fanclub did a cool version of 'Like a Virgin' and there was of course Kelly Osbourne's version of 'Papa Don't Preach' (which, to be honest, I didn't think was all that awful).

Still, a high profile cover of a Madonna song was inevitable. The film Material Girls starring the sisters Duff has been touted for ages now, as has the version of 'Material Girl' that would be its theme song. Apparently it is no longer to be a single, however, and just as well.

The weirdest part of this crime against faggotry is that the song is produced by Timbaland. What the fuck was he thinking slapping a cheesy beat left over from Brandy's last album to vocals that the sisters seemingly phoned in while at the manicurist?

It will come as no surprise that this version lacks any of the sluttish charm of the original, but the fact that it has even less sass than the Tamperer's deliberately deadpan interpolation of the song on 'If You Buy This Record Your Life Will Be Better' is really rather remarkable.