Stop the presses!

I'm interviewing Marilyn.

This is craptacular beyond my wildest dreams.

What the fuck..

is this???

Anyone know more? There are pages for all your blogs too...

So, so weird.

Whii oh Whii?

Nintendo's new console is going to be called Wii.

It was originally going to be called Revolution, but apparently that is too hard to remember.

This previous name had already been widely publicised. In fact, the Nintendo website actually says that 'Revolution has a new name'.

Supposedly, Wii isn't meant to connote We. I think more of wee, but maybe I'm just infantile. I'm not convinced that Wii connotes togetherness or collectivism (and certainly the latter is an argumnent for 'Revolution' surely?). At best it could suggest wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

Still, Revolution was a kick ass name for a console - why the hell change it? And from pictures, it looks more like a Revolution than a urination.

Further to the last post

This wouldn't load in the last post for some reason.

Say hi to your President for me

Am I the only one who, upon seeing headings about 'Rove' being in trouble, gets excited and then disappointed when he realises that it's not about Rove McManus but Karl Rove, only to belatedly get excited again upon realising that you do actually hate the latter one more?

Apparently Rove Live has become a ratings disaster of late. So who the hell is going to win this year's Gold Logie?


Natalie Bassingthwaighte?
PROS: She's a cool character and is the only Neighbours person up for it, and should appeal to those likely to vote by text message (a new innovation). Extra points for being in Rogue Traders.
CONS: If Delta can't make Neighbours and a singing career add up to Gold, I'm not sure Natalie can.

Bridie Carter?
PROS: Channel Nine's only real contender (if Bert counts as Channel 10).
CONS: 'Best of a bad bunch' is hardly a winning formula. Won't appeal to anyone who doesn't regularly watch McLeod's Daughters.

Bec Hewitt?
PROS: She'll have psyched herslf up using the 'Balboa' method.
CONS: Glut of Home and Away nominees. Hasn't been on TV all year. Writes the worst poetry this side of student publications. General bint.

Rove McManus?
PROS: Incumbency. He's the safe option. He's not on Home and Away. The sort of person people vote for when they don't actually watch any of the shows from which the nominees come.
CONS: There must be the odd person who has noticed he's a total fucktard by now, and the ratings slide suggests that if he does win Channel 10 might be faced with the embarassing prospect of axing their Gold Logie boy.

Bert Newton?
PROS: Kitsch value - possibly an asset with text voters. He's cool, even if no-one watches his new show.
CONS: Anyone who has seen Bert's Family Feud won't want to encourage Channel Nine to stick with him.

Ada Nicodemou?
PROS: Won Dancing With The Stars, easily the most consistently high rating show on Australian TV. Wog vote is surely worth something.
CONS: DWTS viewers may not be able to compete with younger text-happy fans of other shows. Glut of Home and Away nominees. As my flatmate put it: "She's no Rebekah Elmalogalou".

Kate Ritchie?

PROS: Hahahahahahahahahaha. Um, OK... well the guy in her porn film looked pretty cute. Does he get an award?

CONS: Glut of Home and Away nominees. Glut of her boobies. Glut of her in general. Glut, glut, glut.

John Wood?
PROS: Sentimental favourite (eight million nominations and never a win). People might feel extra sentimental because Blue Heelers has now been axed.
CONS: It didn't get axed for nothing.

My pick:

My gut is telling me that Natalie might get up, but I wouldn't rule out Ada or John. Of course maybe Rove will just win again. If he's finished giving evidence.

Sportingbet reckons I'm way off, at least on Natalie. Maybe she's worth a small bet? Am still kicking myself over the picking-Casey-Donovan-when-she-was-100-to-1 fiasco. Radar is similarly skeptical of the Bassingthwaightemeister.

Super, thanks for asking!

Rather than wait for shows like Desperate Housewives to finally show here, and annoyed with other forms of downloading, I've been downloading TV shows through the US Itunes Music Store. Maybe I'm a sucker for paying $2.50 ($2US) an episode, but life is too shrt to sepnd time doanloading fake files, and I'm just not skilled at the whole thing. As I've said before, fucking technophobia.

Anyway, through Itunes I've discovered I can watch shows that mylovelyAmericanfriend (MLAF) recommends, and one he showed me an episode of was My Super Sweet Sixteenth, an MTV show about, yep, rich kids having mega parties to celebrate turning 16. Sure the show is probably staged (and the net is full of people defening their friends against the way they were shown on the show - but that doesn't save the people who are still volunteering to be on the show in its third season!), but it is still car crash TV par excellence, the next best thing to Being Bobby Brown.

Most of the Sweet Sixteeners are girls, but all of them are princesses.


Take Cindy. I think she's half Filipina, but perhaps that's just because her mother reminds me of Rose Hancock-Porteous. She has a Cinderella themed party - but sadly sans pumpkin style coach - and hires a dancer to help her recreate the dance scene from Dirty Dancing. She throws out an uninvited guest, threatening to fight in her dress, and she bickers with her mother, who is vicariously living her own unrealised sweet sixteen dreams (in her own white princess dress).

Now meet Bjorn (you pronounce the J as a J not a Y). One of the few males featured on the show, he's a raging pre-homo who has a party in his favourite place - the mall - with its own fashion show. His parents seem delightfully unphased by his ass bandit antics, but all hell breaks loose when there are only 3 corsets for the show and 4 best friends who want to wear them. Bjorn calls himself a 'Divo', or male Diva, and he sure as hell acts it. I do like the customised jacket he shows off at the end though.

Carlyisia (there's a name for you CSH) is the daughter of R'n'B singer Gerald Levert. I don't know why the hell he let her appear on this show,
but her sweet sixteenth comes to a head with her performance of her first single (after she signs autographed CDs as party invites). Carlysia has a personal assistant. However, she lacks looks and talent. Whilst no-one seems to notice that she's a tad porkier than Beyonce (who she compares herself to), her father does threaten to cancel the performance when her singing practice reveals the likelihood that she'll embarass herself and her family. I think Gerald should have made good on the threat, but you can judge Carlysia's vocal chops for yourself here.


Best of all is Ava, who manages double points by being both a Jewish American Princess AND Persian (as MLAF put it, a PerJAP). Ava goes to Paris to find a dress with her mother, friend and stylist and then complains that she can't find what she wants (her mother refuses to let her buy a dress that is too revealing). Now don't be fooled into thinking that a trip to paris might be her birthday present or anything, because there's a car (which oddly is a Range Rover - maybe she knew in advance that the other kids on this show all seem to get Mercedes) and a $200,000US Arabian Night themed party, complete with handpicked college waterpolo players to lift her sedan chair.

Ava gets herself in a spot of trouble when (at age 15, remember) she runs off to Santa Barbara with her cousin and doesn't tell her Mom. She is outraged when Mom responds by cancelling her credit card, and many tears are shed when she is told she won't be getting a car for her birthday as a result. Luckily, her parents relent just in time for the party.

Of course there is a stern warning: Ava must respect her parents.

"Yeah... That'll definitely happen."

Amusing album of the week

It seems Ms Loeb actually has a substantial back catalogue, but who can remember anything besides 'Stay'?

OK, I liked 'Do You Sleep', but I'm supposed to remember obscure pop shit...

(And MY haven't I gotten good at this linking to random shit thing?)

Me so pretty

It seems that anyone who is anyone is copying Queer Penguin with this whole what-celebs-does-my-face-resemble hoo-ha, so here's my top result (68%):

Yep, convincing. Cause having a try-hard(er) version of the hair makes up for my lack of lips, a bum-chin or any other of Ashton's characteristics.

This one makes a little more sense:

There are some pics of my dad that are very Brando-esque, and I'm always getting told I look like him.

Note to self: This is bordering on blogging about yourself. And you HATE that.

I heart the Dixie Chicks

Not Ready To Make Nice

Forgive, sounds good.
Forget, I'm not sure I could.
They say time heals everything,
But I'm still waiting

I'm through, with doubt,
There's nothing left for me to figure out,
I've paid a price, and i'll keep paying

I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should

I know you said
Why can't you just get over it,
It turned my whole world around
and i kind of like it

I made by bed, and I sleep like a baby,
With no regrets and I don't mind saying,
It's a sad sad story
That a mother will teach her daughter
That she ought to hate a perfect stranger.
And how in the world
Can the words that I said
Send somebody so over the edge
That they'd write me a letter
Saying that I better shut up and sing
Or my life will be over

I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should

I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should

Forgive, sounds good.
Forget, I'm not sure I could.
They say time heals everything,
But I'm still waiting

(NB. Despite a probable radio blackout, this song is set to explode on the US charts thanks to paid downloads - it's number two on itunes already).

And speaking of CD covers...

"Ew," as Miranda Devine would say, "Double ew."

Speaking of Collette...

This...



...seriously cracks me up.

I actually saw this CD cover in a shop once in about 1992. I swear my mind was warped then and there.

Ding dong, ding dong

There are very few pictures of oz popster Collette online, despite her career spanning two decades (1989-1990), so this one of her with DJ Maynard will have to do. At least it's been signed with what appears to be red lipstick. Class.

I honestly would not have ordinarily tuned into Where Are They Now (with Mel and 'Kochie', admittedly the best option in the unlikely scenario that I'm watching TV at 9am or so) deliberately, but when you channel flick and see something about Diff'rent Strokes, one can surely be forgiven for watching for a while.

After I was regaled with the new life of Todd Bridges, who helps kids say NO to drugs (I wonder if he should be sent in to talk to Bobbi Kristina Brown-Houston?), I was tantalised by the promise that I'd be told what has become of the first Aussie dance diva*, she of 'Ring My Bell' and 'All I Wanna Do Is Dance' fame (and of 'Who Do You Think You Are' obscurity).

And boy was I told! Well, actually I didn' really find out anything I didn' already know, except that she is now a volunteer at Taronga Zoo (and conveniently they have a great student special on at the moment) when she's taking a break from her 'career' in 'hair and makeup' (that bit I already knew about).

Of course it wasn't as exciting as last year when I saw her perform at 'Retrosexual' at ARQ and she danced right up against me and gave me the mic THREE times (that's right, count 'em! I was clearly her favourite audience member, and NO I wasn't the only person there), but you've gotta love that they bothered with her.

I also loved that they called her a one hit wonder - so much for 'All I Wanna Do Is Dance', which almost went top ten (and which she co-wrote: sample lyric - "All I wanna do is dance / Dance, yeah dance / All I wanna do / All I wanna do / All I wanna do is dance") and for her 'Raze the Roof' album!

Still she's an icon for me, and if Melissa Tkautz can make a new album, then Collette shouldn't give up all hope.

*Think about it - she was.

(NB. Bad33d - can you leave a link for your pics of that lovely night at ARQ? Cheers)

Mix CD Time

I feel hopelessly inadequate whenever I see details of a mix tape on dolediary (see links on right, I still can't get that whole link in text thing happening. Fucking technophobia!). However, I haven't owned a tape deck in some years, and it's not a technology I'm convinced about the retro appeal of (despite my awesome collection of cassingles - Snap! anyone?), so it seems a mix CD is all you're gonna get.

I might even burn a few copies for anyone who requests it, but I'm also currently lacking in graphic design software, so don't expect much in the way of a cover.

I think I'm gonna do two CDs, one of newish stuff and one of poptaculosity 'classics'.

Some probable inclusions:

Robyn - 'Be Mine'
Paris Hilton (allegedly) - 'Screwed'
Rachel Stevens - 'Negotiate With Love'
Bananarama - 'Lovebite'
(C)harlot(te) Church - 'Call My Name'
Girls Aloud - 'Models'
William Shatner - 'Common People'
Bertie Blackman - 'Television' (Remix)
Annie - 'Greatest Hit'
Lindsay Lohan - 'Confessions of a Broken Heart (Daughter to Father)' (Remix Edit)
Freezepop - 'I Am Not Your Gameboy'
Sugababes - 'Red Dress'
Mylo feat. Miami Sound Machine - 'Dr Pressure'
Pleasure feat. Justine Frischmann - 'Don't Look the Other Way'
Pet Shop Boys - 'I'm With Stupid'
Eurythmics - 'Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)' (Steve Angelo Bootleg)
Kylie Minogue - 'Made of Glass'
Melissa Tkautz - 'The Glamorous Life'
Wigwam - 'Wigwam'

Girls Aloud - 'The Show'
Spice Girls - 'Wannabe' (Vocal Slam Mix)
Cyndi Lauper - 'Hole In My Heart (All the Way to China)'
Dolly Parton - '9 to 5' (Almighty Mix)
Noeline Donaher - 'No Regrets'
O-Zone - 'Dragostea Din Tei'
Madasun - 'Don't You Worry'
Sunscreem - 'Love U More'
Dream - 'He Loves You Not'
Emma Bunton - 'Crickets Sing For Anamaria'
Liza Minnelli - 'Don't Drop Bombs'
Bananarama - 'Love In The First Degree'
JC Chasez - 'All Day Long I Dream About Sex'
Opus III - 'It's a Fine Day'
Lindsay Lohan - 'Rumours'
Sugababes - 'Freak Like Me'
Divine - 'You Think You're a Man'
Dannii - 'Disremembrance'
Army of Lovers - 'Crucified'
Anjeza Shahini - 'The Image of You' (Eurovision 2004 - Albania)
Collette - 'Who Do You Think You Are'
Betty Boo - 'Where Are You Baby?'

OK, so my defintion of 'classics' basically is 'anything I'm currently enjoying that I can't possibly pass off as 'new' (for instance, Lindsay Lohan's 'Rumours' is newer than the Pleasure song, but hardly anyone has heard of Pleasure and I have another newer Lindsay song I like anyway), but what the hey, it's my mix.

Any suggestions?

I am disrespectful to dirt!

I kept wondering why I was getting stared at today.

After a while I realised that it was my "Mr Sparkle" Simpsons t-shirt. (The episode where the Simpsons go to Japan after seeing what appears to be Homer's face on a detergent box, but then it turns out to be a coincidence)

This has happened before - it's a pretty cool t-shirt (and bought OS, so I don't tend to see anyone else with one) - but not to the same extent.

Then someone I know commented, and told me that the episode was on last night. Then two more people said the same thing.

How many people still lap up every repeat of The Simpsons that Channel 10 serves up? No wonder they're cocky about their youth demographic!

Change one letter in this title..

"Souths Blow Big Lead"

I misread the above article title on smh.com.au and the picture seemed to go well with my misreading. `

I almost even read the story!



http://www.smh.com.au/news/league/souths-blow-big-lead/2006/04/17/1145126049780.html

Thank god for research...

Young people who adopt the "Goth" lifestyle of dark clothes and introspective music are more likely to commit self-harm or attempt suicide than other youngsters, a Scottish study has found.

(story at: http://www.smh.com.au/news/world/goths-more-at-risk-study/2006/04/14/1144521497560.html)

In other news, a study has shown that men who adopt the "Gay" lifestyle are more likely to get fucked up the arse.

i want to hear you tell me you don't want my love

I've been listening a lot to Jose Gonzalez's version of 'Hand On My Heart'.

It was always my favourite Kylie song, and perhaps favourite Stock-Aiken-Waterman song too (but there's 'This Time I Know It's For Real' and 'I'd Rather Jack' to consider too), but I'm not sure I knew why until I heard it slowed down and sung tenderly, longingly.

It seems like a clever pop cover version is becoming de rigeur for alt-folk singer-songwriter types, but this one is more than a novelty. It's a tribute to human expression - even a songwriting machine can produce something beautiful.

'Hand On Your Heart':

Well it's one thing to fall in love
But another to make it last
I thought that we were just begining
But now you say we're in the past

Look me in the eye and tell me we are really through

You know it's one thing to say you love me
But another to mean it from the heart
And if you don't intend to see it through, why did we ever start?

I want to hear you tell me you don't want my love

Put your hand on your heart and tell me it's all over
I won't believe it till you put your hand on your heart and tell me that we're through

Put your hand on your heart

They like to talk about forever
Most people never get the chance
Do you wanna lose our love together?
Do you find a new romance?

I want hear you tell me you don't want my love

Put your hand on your heart and tell me it's all over
I won't believe it till you put your hand on your heart and tell me that we're through

Put your hand on your heart
Hand on your heart

Look me in the eye and tell me we are really through

Cry_Wolf

Not_Bad.